The last weeks I’ve had several clients with a bullying experience in their past. From being bullied at school, the workplace to being bullied by a relative. All situations where you can’t just walk away from. And as I often explain to my clients, if you e.g. change environment, it can happen again if the root cause inside you isn’t released. I prefer to see bullying as an opportunity to let go of a blockage and to step into your power. When you’re being bullied you feel powerless. When you’ve transformed the situation in yourself, you feel empowered. That’s what you need to focus on, cause it’ll be life changing for you.

So what happens if you’re being bullied? Another person pushes you’re buttons. In other words, emotions inside you are being triggered and come to the surface. For example anger or fears. Your mind will often go into thoughts like ‘why me?’, ‘it’s unfair’, ‘I’m not good enough’, or ‘nobody likes me’. These thoughts can go around in circles and spiral you down into a low vibration, which makes you even an easier target to bully.

The big question is of course how you can change this situation. It’s starting with the emotions and feelings you have. To acknowledge them and to allow them to be there. You probably tried to avoid them, maybe suppressed them with addictions like sugar, caffeine, smoking, or alcohol. You’ve noticed then that it only worked short term, because the feelings and emotions are still there and pop up again. The reason they come to the surface, is because they are ready to be released and they are helping you to let go and transform the situation.

It helps to say out loud what feelings and emotions you experience while allowing them to be there completely. By saying them out loud you give them a way out of your body. If you feel fears, say out loud what fears they are, e.g.: I’m scared that this will never stop, I’m afraid to not stand up for myself, I’m afraid to get hurt more, I’m afraid to be rejected by others, I’m scared to lose the people I love.

It’s important to come to forgiveness of the bully. To come to that point, you can scan inside your body what you still feel as resistant to forgive the bully. That resistance is what you still need to release first. Think about anger, maybe even hate, resentment, sense of righteousness or punishment. It can also help to see the little child in the bully, because their younger self is often emotionally hurt. A bully is someone who doesn’t feel loved, supported, or connected and they are very insecure deep inside, although they pretend to the outside world to be confident. Bullying someone else makes them feel better about themselves, because of the power. It gives the bully a sense of control where in their personal life, they don’t feel control about love, support or connection with their loved ones.

I also get children in my practice who are being bullied at school. The good part of this is that it can be transformed faster when it’s happening. When someone comes in as an adult and the bullying took place at primary school, then there’s often more work to do because they might have created many negative beliefs about themselves and the effects in life are bigger. Children are often very forgiving and it is fantastic to see how they stand in their power again with a huge increase in their self-esteem and confidence.

I’ve been bullied at high school myself. Not very long but I am sensitive and noticed that there was a building up of tension between two girls and me. I had talked with my mother about this tension I was sensing, and got her advice to just walk away from them and pretend it didn’t affect me. One day, when I did this, the two girls kicked me and I quickly left to go into the changing room. My sports teacher saw me leaving and came after me. We talked about what happened, and he must have talked to the two girls also. It never happened again. The advice of my mother hadn’t been a useful advice that worked for me, and that day I decided I would do what felt good for me, so being true to myself, and to stand up for myself and use my voice. This resulted even in becoming friends with one of the girls after this event.

It sounds maybe strange, but sending love and light in your thoughts to the bully helps to transform the situation too. It’s not what you would think of, but it is very effective. And of course you can ask your guides and angels to help you transform the situation into respect for each other and having removed all negative energy between the bully and you. If you’d like to work on transforming your experience of being bullied in the past into standing in your power again with increased self-esteem, I’m offering 3 Free Explore your Happiness Sessions of approx. 30 mins by phone to discuss your personal situation and give you some useful tips and advices how to release your feelings and emotions. Apply for a free session through this link and I’ll contact you within 24 hours to schedule an appointment for the phone call.