In an online session my client was telling about her life when my attention got caught by her description ‘it happens to me’ that she used a few times. I asked her how it feels that she experiences things happen to her over and over again in life. I sensed it made her feel powerless and that was the case.
Instead of going to find the root cause of this pattern, I chose another approach. I advised her to make a decision to stop this pattern and together we created a sentence to do so. She wrote this sentence in chalk on her blackboard:
I decide now that I reclaim my power, so that I am in control and in charge of my own life. And so it is!
I encouraged my client to repeat her decision a few times out loud. She kept repeating and with the seventh time she felt it had transformed and it had become her truth and reality.
She felt an inner peace and felt grounded firmly and in the present moment.
A bit further in the session we unraveled two more decisions to make for my client. It had become a habit for her to fill in for close loved ones what their needs would be. By asking her more questions, it became clear that she did this from a belief that her loved ones couldn’t take good care of themselves.
This is actually an ego-aspect that makes her believe that she can take better care of her loved ones than they can themselves. It’s a matter of free will and everyone needs to get the freedom to learn to take care of themselves by experience.
If you fill in for others’ needs, you take away that opportunity to learn. You’re interfering with their responsibility for themselves. It’s crossing their boundaries too, even though it’s from love with good intentions.
Here are the two decisions my client made after this insight:
* I decide now to stop filling in for others.
* I decide now to stop taking over other people’s responsibility.
At the end of the session my client felt empowered, very well grounded and in the present moment, confident, and calm inside.
If you’d like to find out what patterns or habits you can transform to empower yourself and create calmness inside, apply now for a free Lighten Your Load Check Up call to discuss your situation and receive my feedback.
Apply here: https://astridboot.com.au/free-lighten-your-load-check-up/
